Work-safe porn

Sure, between the 24% chance to lose a job and 3% chance to lose a kid, there are a lot of reasons to wish I hadn't been afflicted with this kind of sexuality, but there are benefits too. Chief among them is that our sexuality is so weird that we can get away with looking at pornography that no one but ourselves would characterize as such. I mean, how many men can get turned on by reading radical feminist discourse?

"To call a man an animal is to flatter him; he's a machine, a walking dildo."

Oh yeah, talk dirty to me, man-hating foes of the patriarchy! I wonder what her response would be if she learned that that's the epitome of a turn-on for the female supremacists, nearly all of whom are male.

Like most heterosexual or bisexual submissive men, I have indulged in fantasies about the dominant women utopia, even if they are almost strictly a campy, guilty pleasure. For all of the triviality they represent, however, I think their pervasiveness reveals something deeper. One of the better BDSM bloggers on the net called it categorical degradation, a desire to have something fundamental to ourselves found as inferior. And much as I sympathize with the gender benders out there, and loathe the gender binary, there's not much that's more fundamental to our identity, or as innate to ourselves, as gender.

Socrates and I have been discussing adding insults to our sexual repertoire. The odd thing is, it's not really a desire to be insulted, much as the desire for pain isn't really a desire to be hurt. If he honestly insulted me on something I was actually insecure about- on my inability to bring him to orgasm more than once in our meetings a few weeks ago, say - it would definitely be hurtful, and probably not even arousing. But call me slut or whore - despite the fact that the insults are almost completely inapplicable to me; I was a virgin before Socrates, after all - and I turn into a submissive puddle of mush. And there's a really odd space where "bitch" evokes all the positive, safe places of submission and control without anything that makes me insecure. Much of BDSM activity, especially in the more cerebral parts of it, consists in evoking all of the positive emotions concerned with these usually negative phenomena without straying into negativity. Which brings us back to dominant female utopia and categorical degredation.

I think the reason why categorical degredation is so appealing to the submissive crowd is because its so good at evoking all the positive emotions without the negative. Because it's categorical, something that you don't have control over, something that is fundamentally not your fault, you can't be guilty because of it, it can't be something you're truly insecure about. As such, it evokes everything positive without the negative.

And while gynosupreamacy may be both intellectually bankrupt and not applicable to my current homosexual relationship, there's always Aristotle's natural slave. Which brings me back to my first point: who else can find pornography in philosophy class?